Prelude

I feel particularly poised for the future like I never had been before.

Living alone is WONDERFUL. I don't think I'll ever do the roommate carousel again. For the first time in my life, I am not finding myself compromised by obligations and needing to navigate through another's emotional weather.

I don't think I've had this much freedom ever. I had no idea how much noise there was until I met with my silence. It's not that I don't like sharing space but it's refreshing to not hear the various drones that had filled my days in the past.... They are all normal "white noise" that has its own comfort level.

"Did you eat yet?" "You should get some sleep." "Are you doing anything?" "When will you be home?" "What are you doing this weekend?" "Can I borrow this?" "Let me tell you about how today was the worst day of my life!" "Let me tell you about this new guy at work..." "Let me tell you about..." yada yada

I am not as patient as other people who enjoy the questions and daily ritual of soap dramas in living color at home. My metronome setting is moderato though I enjoy episodes of adagio and presto. I'm finally free to sit with my own thoughts and rhythm and I like it. I'm not finding myself uncomfortable in my own skin. I'm happy as I've always been and learned that I've been stretching myself in being a source for others.

Tomorrow I am hosting a party with a handful of close friends. I've traditionally thrown big parties in the past. It makes sense that I begin my year with my round table... my royal court...

My kingdom is poised for a good season of strategy and good fortune.

This time to myself that I've been enjoying is just the prelude. I'm looking forward to an exciting 2007.

JNET