"I'm getting married next year." I've began announcing to my friends recently. What follows that happy statement is a round of hugs and beaming smiles as well as the standard CONGRATULATIONS.
My friends and I have been enjoying a good laugh over it. You see, I don't even have what constitutes as a regular boyfriend. I adore my solitude and independence too much to participate regularly in social rituals such as dating. I also keep entertaining thoughts to take on holy orders but what keeps me from making that decision is that I think a broader spiritual life can be had outside the structure and security of a religious community.
The ascetic life appeals to me but after a year of attending to friends weddings and watching both my brothers start their families, I've been given a very joyful window to observe a possibility of spirituality in the space of TWO.
Can two independent minds and hearts combine without imposing identity and ego over another? That's a language I'd like to discover. If it exists.
I've managed to spurn cupid's arrow thus far. A part of me thinks cupid won't leave me alone and is gaining distance. It's a bit unnerving. I might as well start announcing my wedding plans.
JNET
You really are something with your blog. I hope you do get married. The lucky guy does not even know it yet.
ReplyDeleteI am convinced the journey is at least as, if not more, important than the destination. Not everyone succeeds in life, but that doesn't have to equate to unhappiness. You seem to be happy in your music and career, it's your love life that's up in the air. So let me make a prediction. You're a sweet person. It will happen. You can't rush it, you can only leave yourself open to take the leap where and when it happens. I like people who not only anticipate the best in themselves, but look for, and celebrate, the good in others. You are such a person.
ReplyDeleteMy best,
McBill
I just love your world, Jnet :) Thanks again, for your great stuff mate. :) xx
ReplyDeleteApril
I am not sure what I appreciate most about your blog ... your eye for good art and photos, or your way with words. I enjoyed your stuff. I hope you do something with your writing talent.
ReplyDeleteTake care.
Bob
Love your latest posts ... about the marriage and companionship thing! Your comment about mingling two and keeping your independence resonates with me.
ReplyDeleteI'm approaching 40 years of marriage (to the same woman). We started dating at 14, got married at 19 and started having kids.
I've been a very difficult person for her to be around. I have fought for my independence for years ... now she's starting to loosen the reins a little :) That's from my side ... I know she sacrificed her life as well.
Stay the way you are until you are absolutely sure you've experienced everything you want to. Share when you want, be selfish when you want, have no obligations, be spontaneous ... and when you are satisfied and want to join with another person to become a third entity you will know.
No guilt, no pressure ... ;)
Michael