DANCE: Thanksliving on a Teacup Ride

I attended my dance company's 20th anniversary performance and celebration last night - as an audience member. I hadn't done that since before I joined them several years ago.

I missed the stage but I appreciated loving KNL from the house; to be entralled with the audience and see what I've missed in being a performer.

What did I see as a performer? A world of rehearsals; counting counting counting, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 ,8, memorizing choreography before dancing to the sound of music - a world where understanding the director's vision came in fragments and you were simply inspired by their spirit. A world of discipline, where commiting time and body demanded saying nos and not yets to create the focus and energy to manage practice inside and outside of rehearsals. Costumes, make-up, quick changes, entrances, exits; being a part of an ensemble, riding the adrenaline rush, bright lights, applause.

That's the fun part.

To perform taps into passion and trust; its transformational. And it feels tremendous because of the worthy sacrifices you made. Demanding an ego to not flinch when mistakes were made and remain gracious and focused on a vision despite frustrations in working to get things perfect.

What did I see as an audience member? I was able to see the complete story and imagination that expanded beyond music and choreography. I was able to enjoy a story unfold before my eyes weaving the art of light design and multi-media; showing me how beautiful and expansive was the vision that I sensed in spirit but never fully saw with my eyes how the dance pieces were tied together. I was moved to tears and found that I was not the only one caught up. There were so many people riding the waves of emotion of sight and sound with me. A community was created.

As an audience member I saw the captivating big picture that created a world to relate and participate with and not just be a spectator. As a performer I experienced the captivating spirit that transformed me to be beyond myself; I trusted the spirit of a vision.

It was beautiful.

But there is also a back story where I was also performer, audience member AND director and that is the story of why I wasn't dancing at this special performance and why I was sitting alone. This amazing back story I will save for tomorrow.

JNET

Leaving Politics to the Politicians

I voted this past election and found that a good deal of people I asked hadn't even registered to vote. Ever. Several blamed the onslaught of mudslinging adverts for cheesing them off voting and that somehow not voting kept their hands clean.

I was shocked for a little bit. How does one manage to live absolutely trusting that the minority of eligible voters, 41%, showing up to vote will represent a democratic society?

Are we absolutely trusting and confident over our policy makers that we don't need to show up and be "redundant" with our vote? No.

It's worst. And its not voter apathy. If one is truly apathetic about the way society and how policy affects it, then one would be indifferent and have no worries and concerns.

We're learning to complain and not act. Acting helpless while complaining is becoming the new human tribe activity. Meanwhile we have congress representatives fighting on the platform for a mostly silent stay-on-the-couch-and-complain "constituency" who did not bother to vote.

Voting is now below 50%. With people complaining about uncertain futures it boggles me that they don't care for "politics" and yesterday when I chose to share links on the TSA's direction of security, I got grief for being "uptight" for sharing information.

I wasn't coming from a place that was complaining. I thought it would be useful to know what with the holidays coming that you might be randomly selected for the "scanner" which is being discussed as questionable by scientists. I have yet to talk to a radiologist friend about it. But in general, I thought, most people know that x-rays are not good for you. I've had x-rays taken before. Usually the technician LEAVES the room before pushing the button.

They are not good for pregnant women, small children, people who are already fighting cancer and the elderly.

If you choose to opt-out of the scanner which makes Superman perverts out of the TSA security people because it dresses you down and takes an image, then you must subject yourself to a pat down where you will be touched about in search of hidden contraband. You are subject to a 10K fine if you refuse to cooperate.

From the testimonies of those that I came across - it was not a good experience in the name of security. People are being intimidated. Do we want to dismiss the stories and just say it is an urban legend? We are heading towards a society where people will be treated less as constituents and more like cattle.

People are chosen randomly and TSA is not necessarily taking out terrorist looking people from the line. If you are attractive and someone fancies to see you naked, you may be plucked from the line. Such was the case with several girls.

Currently the "naked" images of several passengers are swirling about the internet as people buzz about TSA and how certain officials are making BANK with the scanners. Mind you, these folks have private planes and may not have to go through cancer causing, DNA mutagenic scanners to go on vacation or a business trip. I also doubt that their children have to be pat-down and touched rigorously by a stranger.

For the price of safety, are you willing to give up being treated with respect? Are you willing to accept that frisking grandma is part of getting on with vacation? REALLY? REALLY????

There has to be a better way to create a safe society without dehumanizing people. There has to be a way to respectfully talk to someone and assess if they are dangerous to put on a plane without the scanner, pat-down, strip searches drama. Are we trying really hard to not talk and relate?

Civilization has built beautiful great cities, inspired great art and shown that people can shine with creativity. Are we tapped out?

So now I suppose to be part of the "normal majority" would be to subject ourselves to whatever we are told is for our own good and be dependent, unthinking breathing, compliant units that like to say are human...

Nevermind that you have a voice, a conscious mind and a sense that things are not quite right. You have better things to do anyway than worry about policy makers and how their decisions affect your life. This TSA buzz will be so yesterday after a few football games anyway. Right?

Maybe you didn't make your vote count. You can still make your voice count, get a tiny bit enlightened about the state of affairs and tell a friend.

Have a great holiday season. Treat people with respect and expect the same. Maybe that could be a beginning direction to take toward national security?

JNET

Jnetsworld Turns SIX

jnetsworld turns six

Welcome to the party. Jnetsworld is happy and thriving at six years old. What makes for a happy six year old?

Climbing trees, cracking eggs into the bowl, the tooth fairy and the continuation of the fun-a-rama.

Climbing trees - jnetsworld stills grows in blogspot. If you want to read the rougher draft of things, this is where I allow my rough side to exist. My blogspot gets imported onto tumblr and my wordpress polishings get copied to stumbleupon.

Cracking eggs into the bowl - jnetsworld gets adventurous and sometimes podcasts. What to title a show about arts and the conundrum fun of being a human being and negativity slayer? More Than a Headshot. Public speaking practice on an internet radio show pressed me to join Toastmasters International. Where I didn't waste any time and set off to write and perform as many speeches as possible and compete at contests.

The tooth fairy - bonuses from losing baby teeth. I lost some teeth when I got duped by a false friend's project that I will simply refer as Clandestine Wax Cutie. Despite the drama, I appreciated being able to play with my passion for photography which prompted me to initiate hellos to photographer whose work inspired me. I introduced myself as well as was introduced to photographers whom I respect and have been very kind and helpful toward me. Lesson: a "lost" may simply be getting rid of "baby teeth" - allow what is strong to grow into the space - and celebrate the gift under your pillow when you finally wake up.

Continuation of the fun-a-rama - Life is still fun and interesting with many worthy points to write about. I owe much to the good people that help generate my world through their love, their coaching, their encouragements and their many ways of being that challenge and inspire me.

I've stretched beyond being unshy. I've grown my voice and mark its signature. And I feel that I have become more focused as I had forgiven momentary lapses quickly and got on with the creative game of Life.

In celebrating another birthday, here are a few of my favorite reviews and comments.

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PAULFRANK: "I think I am in love."

DESTINYSFATE: "Different in each & every way possible yet so much in which she shares....I'm in awe of how I can honestly concur & relate to the 100th degree. Unique virtual boutique of expressions and suggestions"

JAMES: "Jnet, I love the way you write…such beauty."

LITBITOFSONSHINE: "I loved her creative writing on her stumbleupon and her wordpress. She rocks and rolls and has such a open and sharing and caring understanding soul; one I even marked to read again as I will also visit her pages. Its nice to learn about families from her point of view as well as so many other mind expanding things - just wowzers."

DAVE: "I loved your “loving like an athlete.” Keep up your good writing…."

ALAN: "You inspired me to change my blogs look as well, alas, my change was not as stunningly successful as yours. This is to be expected though, since your talent shines through everything you do here. My compliments!"

DESTINY: "Love your world and thanks to you, I can now define myself in all the diversity and unique(ness) that I possess as a person…as a woman. Just saying Hello and wanted to share that..nothing more. I enjoy the substance of your blogs."

RICHARD: "My beautiful and talented friend. Again, I must tell you how well you write, but of much more importance than that, how very proud I am to “know” someone like you. You have such fine judgment, your values are impeccable and you seem dedicated to your art. As you know, choosing a life of creativity is not without its pitfalls. However, you do not need my advice and will find your way. You know I wish you well, Richard."

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Six years old! Amazing.

And it really touches me that some of my readers have been part of this world of mine for several years and that we can call one another friend. In writing I have found kin spirits and fellow rugged angels. I know the world is a good place and that there are many others who also enjoy a beautiful life of good friends and family where a new face can find a welcome space where people are celebrating the blessing of living and thriving despite any circumstance.

The world is full of strong, loving, powerful and kind people. Thank you for being part of the party in turning six.

JNET

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Dancing to Distill JNET

I can make myself disappear.

Wouldn't you like to know how to make yourself disappear to a point where you can't see your arms, your legs, your body as you do in daily life and see a new vision that you almost didn't recognize yourself?

A creative vision that has been inspired and is inspiring... a vision that you didn't know could be so beautiful. You? Beautiful? Yes. Beautiful in such a way that you forget your awkwardness and that self-critical voice that paralyzes you in private moments.

By dancing?

Why not?

I'm speaking specifically about social, community, and cultural dance. Since I'm not a club girl, I cannot speak from that groovy perspective.

But I know what its like to learn cultural dances and what it is like when a certain song comes on to see your grandma and others younger and older show just how connected you are because of a dance and a song.

And I know what its like to learn different types of social dances and find that you can have a laugh with a Russian, an Italian, and a crowd that makes the UN look uptight simply by loving tango, waltz, or flamenco.

Through dance a world fills me and I find I am never a stranger even though I may walk through unfamiliar doors for the first time. And I meet teachers and directors and choreographers that will look at people with so much possibility that there is no room for awkwardness to slow down the moment.

You can disappear too. And see yourself made beautiful by the vision of an art, discipline, and practice.

You won't recognize yourself. You will love it.

JNET

Reframing the Sheltered Life

reframing the sheltered life

“A sheltered life can be a daring life as well.
For all serious daring starts from within.”

Eudora Welty

The world is a very strange place once your fly the nest. It can only be hoped that you have learned enough to enjoy that solo walk in the rain.

I enjoyed a relatively nice flight.... my mom, my bestfriends' moms, my friends and relatives were all power upping in the prayer circles sending good vibes to me. I got cards in the mail, care packages, and words of encouragement when I decided to break loose and figure out how to become a grown up 3000 miles away.

I add also that my mom did not agree with my chosen adventure to move to Boston when I had a perfectly nice set-up in San Diego; family, good people, and mentors.

Nonetheless, I got on the plane - minus a hug from my mom.

I knew moving would upset her. I had even refrained from letting her know I got accepted to music school til after I had secured an apartment in Boston.

Nonetheless, having so much encouragement and support fostered a sense of confidence and adventure. I loved the care packages with familiar foods from home. I mailed mom leaves from the east coast autumn as well as a copy of my budget and to share with her how I was managing.

The guy I was dating was not enthusiastic of my moving either. He felt that putting JNET in the city was like putting a baby kitten out in the wild. He even wrote me a "protective" letter in his Christmas card which I underlined and circled with red marker and posted back to him asking him where the love was in his card - telling him that I thought he didn't really mean to write the things he did.

A life growing up at church in a world where R rated movies were not allowed, where saying words likes "stupid" or "dummy" was not acceptable, where grades were discussed and jobs were not allowed (volunteer work acceptable) and most activities were chaperoned by a brother, a grandmother or a nun - qualified my "sheltered life" at one level.

And it is this first level that is easily criticized by peers growing up with different rules where swearing is normal, sardonic conversation is considered clever and people of authority are looked upon with disdain and distrust. I have spent more time and energy in class and rehearsal than hanging out in malls and parties put together. I don't think my social skills were being stunted by missing out on the certain social rituals.

XYZ: "Don't you think that you are missing out in certain experiences?" A classmate once asked when she noticed that I wasn't doing the dating drama rollercoaster.

JNET: "Hardly, I don't miss much when I'm having too much fun with the things I'm doing. I'm performing and travelling. I like rehearsals. I like the people I meet."

My "sheltered life" taught me how to be professional, on time and en pointe before I left high school due to time spent with mentors. I learned how to prepare and state my case before authority types. I respected them and wanted to do well.

I had to learn how to articulate and communicate well to gain new ground and privileges that would take jnetsworld from mom's nest to become my own invention.

I had to learn how to make a stand for myself intelligently and respectfully without emotional fireworks. I was allowed to share my mind. I was allowed my opinions. I was listened to and I was always comforted.

Now that I am grown up, I see many of my students are growing up in similar "sheltered" environments. I think it is a good thing. I see that these young people adore their families. I see adults sensitive to them but not overly indulgent.

JNET is STILL growing up in a sheltered environment.

I feel shielded from the elements (negative people and their drama).

Because I grew up choosing people that make sense by the standard from which I came. And the standard that I got from the "sheltered life" is living life full out, knowing you are not alone (people are a phone call, text, email away), that you have spiritual and emotional support encouraging you to be your best, your kindest, conscientious contributing self.

And the kind people that raised and protected you along the way want you to have all the opportunities possible to you, a better world, a big world that has hope and compassion that is worth exploring and making a mark in.

So that when you see unkindness you want and are moved to make a stand, so that when you see people made disposable or marginalized, it hurts poignantly and you see how many are made numb by having not been shielded as you have in growing up. And you see how blind sighted fear and hate is and it GRIEVES your heart because that is THE response to have when you see compassion and love missing.

I still have friends and family sending the good vibes and care packages nowadays are prepared dinners to take home from a students family if I cannot join them at the table or fresh baked cookies and I still get cards and letters and texts and emails of encouragement.

The sheltered life does not end when you step off the nest. It is a way that caring evolves and makes a life of its own. It forgives missing hugs. It makes space to draw out the better out of people.

My mom is my biggest fan and loves her strange bird a lot. And the boyfriend that wrote that card, flew in from San Francisco while I was visiting during break and apologized. He is one of my dearest friends to this day and he will most likely during his family visit to San Diego from San Francisco make time to have a bevvy and laugh.

There is a sentiment that those that live sheltered lives grow up insular and are either dangerous or very vulnerable once that leave the nest. I decided that the "sheltered life" needed some reframing and dimension explained.

Sheltered is NOT living the perpetual kiddie gated life. Let's try another word; shielded, growing up with a sense that someone is there to listen and encourage, to catch you, protect you, stand for you and raise hell on your behalf should the occasion arise.

When people feel loved and valued, conversations about meeting and overcoming challenges are normal table topics, drama is a hiccup to iron out and there is an openness that buffers people from allowing egos to define situations.

I am grateful for those that have been a shield to me. Those guiding people that made sure I learned kindness because the world needs mindful and thoughtful people. I am grateful for the curfews and going out with body guards teaching me about respect and boundaries. I am grateful for the amount of patience it took to grow me (from others and from myself).

To grow sheltered is to grow strong. And a sheltered life can be daring, for all serious daring begins within.

May you enjoy a sheltered life; shielded by the love of dear people. And may you always be daring. You have the love of so many people rooting on your behalf.

JNET

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