DANCE: Thanksliving on a Teacup Ride

I attended my dance company's 20th anniversary performance and celebration last night - as an audience member. I hadn't done that since before I joined them several years ago.

I missed the stage but I appreciated loving KNL from the house; to be entralled with the audience and see what I've missed in being a performer.

What did I see as a performer? A world of rehearsals; counting counting counting, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 ,8, memorizing choreography before dancing to the sound of music - a world where understanding the director's vision came in fragments and you were simply inspired by their spirit. A world of discipline, where commiting time and body demanded saying nos and not yets to create the focus and energy to manage practice inside and outside of rehearsals. Costumes, make-up, quick changes, entrances, exits; being a part of an ensemble, riding the adrenaline rush, bright lights, applause.

That's the fun part.

To perform taps into passion and trust; its transformational. And it feels tremendous because of the worthy sacrifices you made. Demanding an ego to not flinch when mistakes were made and remain gracious and focused on a vision despite frustrations in working to get things perfect.

What did I see as an audience member? I was able to see the complete story and imagination that expanded beyond music and choreography. I was able to enjoy a story unfold before my eyes weaving the art of light design and multi-media; showing me how beautiful and expansive was the vision that I sensed in spirit but never fully saw with my eyes how the dance pieces were tied together. I was moved to tears and found that I was not the only one caught up. There were so many people riding the waves of emotion of sight and sound with me. A community was created.

As an audience member I saw the captivating big picture that created a world to relate and participate with and not just be a spectator. As a performer I experienced the captivating spirit that transformed me to be beyond myself; I trusted the spirit of a vision.

It was beautiful.

But there is also a back story where I was also performer, audience member AND director and that is the story of why I wasn't dancing at this special performance and why I was sitting alone. This amazing back story I will save for tomorrow.

JNET