He's nice. We have a great time and enjoy conversation and music together. And yet I am not inspired beyond cheerful conversation.
"Darwin would love you." my roommate told me this morning after relaying how Mr. B and I spent the day together.
"Who's Darwin?"
"Charles Darwin, evolutionist... you know, survival of the fittest."
"Of course, that Darwin...a geek for a geek goddess."
Mr. B and I may have the neural connection to discuss literature, music and science but he doesn't make me laugh. Hmmmm. G made note of that last weekend while in Palm Springs with a few friends for a getaway. Not many people put me in a goofy, light or side splitting mood.
Comedy is about style and timing. It's all very personal and I suppose what I'm feeling when the gags are going around are that the laughs are for a general audience. I feel like the message is "someone love me" with arbitrary affections. It's strange to hear a joke and become present to feeling unsettled.... but then again, self-deprecation is fashionable.
I guess it's not very romantic to me but my aloofness does not seem to stave off Mr. B's persistence. I've encouraged him to diversify his prospects noticing that our timing is off. He's determined to upgrade his friendship position despite having stepped on my toes during his mating dances to get my attentions. He likes that I'm "difficult."
I am not sure what to make of such reasoning for pursuing love... I'm not some cosmic joke to get. I'm really just a girl that's been put together just so looking for someone to enjoy and not "get." Forever would be nice... considering that love is an epic journey for me and not a trip to a local candy store.
I want someone to love for the rest of my life...find a conversation that is continously engaging through different seasons... How outdated maybe. I have friends and family and they fit that bill... as for warm fuzzies and affections... Timing is everything.
I'm curious. What would Darwin predict here?
JNET
There is no place in the world where nothing bad can happen. What you are looking for is that place in the world where when something bad does happen... you can run to for solace. The arms that will, yes... make you feel safe, protect you, but.. be there to heal you when life happens. The arms that want you in the good and bad times. As your arms will want to soothe them.
ReplyDeleteWhat would Darwin say?
Darwin would ask... why don't bunnies make a lot of noise when they make love??
Charles Darwin would postulate that this learned behavior has evolved in order to not expose themselves to their predators.
My thoughts??? That quietness you seek involves being yourself... and your perfect partner has to be themselves. If you have to change to make a relationship work... it won't. If the new BF has to change who he is to attract or keep you..that's flattering, but a bad moon on the horizon. If you ever have to change or someone wants to change you in a relationship... run... run to the hills!
Your soulmate will come out of left field and he will NOT be perfect. But he WILL make you laugh and you will know very quickly that you want to share the rest of your life with him.
Your soulmate will tell you he has puppies in the back of the van... and you'll believe him... or at least pretend to.
You soulmate will answer Darwin's question...
Rabbits don't make a lot of noise making love... because...they have... cotton balls.
Did you read TTW?
peace
McBill