Where is JNET?

Hello World.

I've disappeared into work work work work work work work work work. Get the picture? And living the life of a queen in the trenches of appointments, commitments, networking parties has made me wishing for the carefree days of being a happy and content recluse.

Am I happy?

Yes. But I think I need someone to clean my house for me, make my meals, pay my bills so that I can concentrate on my work. Getting on a creative track I also lose time so I've not been eating or sleeping or pampering myself doing girlie stuff which affords me time to be reflective.

And so I am now sick. I'm taking medication and I'm being told to sleep and slow down. But being so good at keeping my queenie appearance... who can tell? I'm dressed and pressed and "on stage" with my "the show must go on attitude." I can only hope that I don't pop.

I spoke with my mathematician last week (he works more intensely than I) and I felt light and happy and remembered... ahhh yes... My muse inspires me to my work... and I miss him but I've been too busy to bother.

I've been surrounded by other suitors vying for the mathematician's position. Sometimes I wish I could just fall in love with one of my other prospective suitors. I'm being offered the world in their hands. They are all wonderful and interesting... but they are not my mathematician. I'm incredibly busy anyway.

This weekend I have an Oscar Party to attend in Beverly Hills right after dance rehearsal on Sunday... which I'll dash to from breakfast and church with J. That's just Sunday. Let's go backwards.... Saturday, I have a meeting with my director from 3pm til ????? At least I can practice the piano in the morning...

I miss practicing. I miss my piano. I have my own private coaching session tomorrow at 9am and I wish I could say that I have that Beethoven 3rd movement perfectly under my fingers. It is 15 pages. I think I have the first half down well enough... at least to not feel embarrassed to show up for my lesson. I know I'm beating myself up. My coach thinks I'm crazy with my schedule and I refuse to drop my weekly lesson. It's my favorite part of my week.

Where is JNET? My friends have asked and have noticed that I'm blogging less.

I've been in my head.

I miss the leisure pace of my former life. I haven't gotten my balance right just yet but I love what I am doing. I haven't taken care of myself as well as I was so disciplined in doing. I miss my mathematician and I am being pursued by other men.

And I thought having a boyfriend to take care of would be time-consuming and complicated. Being out in the real adult world of work has taken me out of my easy world of children and parents... bringing me to the attention of kings seeking someone to rule their worlds with them.

It is a tempting offer to any girl to take the world... But then again... I don't see Jnetsworld possible through those offers thus far.

I love Jnetsworld. I love my life. I guess I'll continue with my journey and all the bumps and hurdles because all this unbalance, missing and being sick is temporary.

Time to get out of my head and back into life.

I love you all. Thanks for your calls and concerns.

JNET