A tale of two leaders¦
The opportunity of conflict and how one leads to create a resolution brought some insights to me this past week. I learned that conflict reveals the noble or less than noble character of a leader. Conflict also reveals ones value toward something or someone for one ismotivated to bring peace and stability to that which one loves and values and as quickly as possible.
Would a king sacrifice his queen?
By queen, I am not referring necessarily to a literal person but rather a principle or value; something that you stand by and grow with. And that which you stand by and value defines you as well as your actions.
And Im not talking about some little pet project or a little nursery rhyme song to arrange. Im talking about building a dream; composing a symphony that draws out your heart and soul.
This past week, two leaders in my life revealed why I follow one and why Ive lost feeling any sense of loyalty to another. Ive know both for relatively a similar amount of time. Both are friends ONE of which I devoted a great deal of time and effort towards helping tobuild his project. It was rigorous. I was one of the first people there and the last to leave but I enjoyed every moment of the 15 hour work day. I happily gave up opportunities of work and performance elsewhere.
I thought he, OPOO, was a worthy king and I wouldve at the time helped build anything he requested. I felt like a valued first chair in the orchestra and I took everything my conductor said to heart and wanted to create good work.
A conflict arose in his orchestra and he left it between myself and the other person to sort out our differences during a timely haitus during which he said he had a pile of arrangements to sort through. He mentioned that he was happy with my work and that he was also excited to share something particular to me in the future.
That is fine and fair. The hiatus was a welcome buffer and I was excited to see copies of what he wanted to share. But a resolution between myself and the other chair was never met.
Four months later, the conductor began the new season with the full orchestra minus me.
And that was fine. He was afterall, king and conductor of his project and I respected that and figured that he had to consider for himself about the best blend of sound he needed.
He never contacted me regarding the something he wanted to share with me. More time passed and I saw the works he was creating and saw that I was edited out. He pulled my name, picture and credit from what he was building without checking in with me. He couldve said thank you but that he wanted to continue composing his work without me. He didnt consider that those actions would break my heart and love for what he stood for. The kindness that he once showed me to draw better art of myself cadenced to actions that I did not understand yet felt very acutely.
And I never said a word of complaint. I was gutted. I didnt know what to say.
Seven months passed before I wrote of it.
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