lent

I've never shared lent with anyone but we've decided to go tandem in our commitments. It's quite gung ho in the way of dating relationships, spending 40 days to grow in discipline and habits considering that weve known each other half as many days.

Ive given firefly permission to care sbout my sleeping schedule among other things, creating a better balance in work and play, writing consistently...etc.  His concern is cute especially since ive never cared much for sleeps.

We are not policing one another and we don't relate to one another in a punitive manner though we transparently share the thoughts and impulses that come before and between us.  Sharing lent has thus far been about sharing our human experience as spiritual beings.

So no fizzy, caffeine, sugary drinks and no store bought sweets.  I've taken to baking and sharing the love.  No swearing and no sexy pepsi will be easy.  I don't use street expletives and well....um...team happy hasn't quite gotten its happys in that ooh la la way if you know what I mean :).

Affection and validation via conversation, hugging and kissing is the rule of this season and the world may be a better place if it wasn't so underrated.

We've only begun and already had a discussion over the gray area of an animal cracker.  I love love love our conversations.

It's a 40 day conversation about discipline and habits;  it's a meditation over values and lifestyle.

I'm enjoying the conversations of this new journey shared.  We're encouraging one another toward better habits and health.  We're forgiving one another patiently while discussing the details.  And after 40 days, I think sharing lent within the newness of us will shape us in a remarkable way.  Amen to that :)

Jnet

everyday feels like valentines day

I did not host my annual cocktails and candy hearts party this year.

My firefly and I have been dipping into the dopamine decanter so much that we're celebrating any reason to see each other mid-week; Valentine's Day presented us Tuesday, rehearsal and the imperative to do laundry gave us Thursday.

We're new.  Really really really new and the momentum of our enthusiasm feels both terrible and thrilling.   I'm part of the stratosphere and yet I feel grounded.  Its dizzying and sobering.

When i am with him i feel present to power and kindness.  He sets himself apart from others.  Conversations that I would find annoying and presumptuous by others land on a different ear by him.  Two weeks new.

JNET:  "Vacation  :) sigh"

R:  "I don't know if this is too soon, but....wanna plan something?"

JNET:  "You're cute.  It's fun to make even fantasy plans.  We won't be able to escape til after March, maybe May."

R:  "Sweet.  Summer!"

JNET:  "You're planning on kissing me 6 months from now :)"

R:  "Of course, but not if you've just had garlic."

Its surreal feeling somewhat swept away.  Ive never surrendered valentines day to anyone.  I had a cocktail party to host to safely distance myself from all overtures of intention.   But here i am surrendering simply by request.  He is at ease yet bold.  Adventurous yet well composed.  Being in the space of his intention is intensely intriguing that I don't have time to make a run for it.  I am comfortable though I'm in a world outside my comfort zone.

Its beyond flowers and sentimental words.  He has a way of making every day feel like valentines day.

JNET

a surprise of light

His nickname "Vagalume" means firefly. I like it. It suits him.

I thought life was brilliant enough and was engaged in my work and studies that I didn't expect anyone to come in and actually catch my attention. I thought that dating was for the lonely or was a form of social recreation that promised more ruin than good but Vagalume came along and lit a path I hadn't noticed.

JNET: "I have a friend in my other dance group that's mentioned he may come by to check out our flamenco class."

C: "Does he like you?"

JNET: "I don't know. He's a nice and friendly sort of person. He's nice to everyone."

Mr. Nice to Everyone visited my rehearsal the following weekend surprising me and setting a buzz of conversation among my girlfriends. Me, the content loner who happily returns to her daily solitude and pursues stretches of silence found my self curious and compelled.

We CELEBRATED two weeks of being caught up in the mystery this past weekend. Looking forward to rehearsals together, planning time together after rehearsal, happy to spend the next bit of free time to go on an adventure or DO LAUNDRY.

Do laundry :)

Is this how it is? How many people in my neighborhood are drinking the same juice and are enjoying being cheesy, quirky, happy that they are hanging out with their own firefly?

I like this.... this surprise of light. Its lit a path I hadn't noticed... I thought Life was full enough with music, dance, my friends and family. Looks like there's enough dance room for fireflies to work out choreography.

JNET